I’ve been telling myself that I was doing something, but i wasnt doing anything. i just need to follow the steps: eating right+exercise=results. why cant i just follow the equation? grrrr i’ll be better. ive only got a year after all

for afternoons…just something for until dinner

Didnt exercise today, but I kept the calories low. I’m under 500 and I am doing good for my first day :)

Height: 5’5”

Weight: 160 lbs

Goal Weight: 140 lbs

Potential Hinderances:

• apparent lack of will
• holidays fast approaching
• its very very cold outside, and there is about 3 feet of snow on the ground
• my dad’s house in general (it confounds my weak will)
• mood swings

The basic story of my weight loss:

I was always overweight. I didn’t want to be helped with it as a child, because I just felt awkward talking about it. I really wish I could have done something then, because it might have made this easier.

I finally decided to do something at the end of 7th grade. I woke up around 5am every morning and went on these intense power walks around the neighborhood. I ate an apple in the morning, an apple at lunch, nothing in the afternoon (I was busy on the treadmill) and binged at dinner. It sucks that that was really unhealthy, because it was the only time that I have independently lost weight (around fifteen pounds).

By the same time the next year, I had not only gained back that weight, but an extra 10 pounds as well. I think I had pretty much just stopped caring at that point, I figured it would happen on its own. That summer, (this past summer) I went to  a weight loss camp. It was really shocking to be there, because I was pretty much the skinniest one there! It was the greatest time. I never felt self conscious, and I always felt hot. I lost 14 pounds, and felt great about myself. After coming home, I lost another 5 pounds. I really stuck to my plans. It all fell apart after the sports season ended. I had nothing to do with myself, and all I did was come home and watch tv, read, or do homework. I needed that exercize in order to succeed. But now I have to put that behind me and keep losing!

I’m not really that overweight. It’s all relative. I just happen to live in a very skinny town where all of my friends are skinny and I just feel sometimes like I NEED to be skinny in order to be happy. The thing is, I am happy, I just would feel better and more comfortable in my own life if I could lose weight.

Dear Internet: This is where I will be posting my weekly successes and failures. Also, any day to day traumas. Wish me luck!